SNP’s word of the day: Goz

Illustration by Lewis Mirrett
Illustration by Lewis Mirrett

Word: Goz

Meaning: Ryan Gosling. Did you actually just ask me that?

Usage: “Perhaps it was too obvious and People magazine decided they wanted to be edgy by not choosing the Almighty Goz, but the Internet is angry” — Toronto Life

You should know it because: The words we need to use the most—like please, like thanks, like you, like me, like like-—are all one-syllable’d. At this point I think we can all agree: Ryan “Hey Girl” Gosling needs to be one of those words. Hence, Goz.

For ease of understanding, best preceded by “the.” After all, there’s only one. When People magazine, which doesn’t know anything, declared Bradley Cooper the “sexiest man alive,” someone (with a working vagina) tweeted in response: “I think you spelled Ryan Gosling wrong.” And with only three letters, Goz is impossible to screw up. Goz is also excellent for chanting over and over outside the offices of People magazine, the Goldman Sachs of the idiot class.

Only one hitch on the Tumblr-paved road to Gozdom: there was an American entertainer by the name of Harry Goz. Still, a) I only found this out one second ago and b) he died in 2003. There’s like, a statute of limitations for name-stealing-and-not-giving-back, right?