Episode 22: When Spencer finds out

Post–computer class. Lauren invites Steph and her fluffy bangs to her 22nd birthday bash. Steph clearly wants to go (who wouldn’t, when the alternative is hanging out at home with Spencer?), but shockingly, she doesn’t want to cause any drama. "Are you sure you really want me there? I mean, I am Spencer’s sister," she says. "I don’t care if you’re Spencer’s sister," Lauren replies. "I’m not gonna dislike someone because of their blood."

Heidi’s apartment. Spencer has dropped by to pick up the rest of his stuff, but first he has a question: "So, are we dating?" Los Angeles is apparently just full of girls looking for a smarmy, crazy-eyed unemployed dude who lives with his sister, and they keep asking him out, he says. Heidi tries to glare at him, but she can barely move her newly-restructured face, so she has to be extra mean to compensate. "I’m not trying to meet guys, and if you’re trying to meet girls, then we should break up," she says. "I thought we were broken up," Spencer half-jokes. "I’m about to punch you in your face," Heidi says. "You can leave."

Spencer takes his jelly aquarium to Steph’s, but she doesn’t want it there, and she seems to be tiring of her brother sleeping on her couch, too. "What are you doing with your life?" Steph asks. "I’m doing you a really big favour… I’ve been being so cool about this whole thing." Spencer can’t even muster a thank you. "When does the maid come?" he asks. "You’re looking at her," Steph growls. "Well, she needs to do those sheets on my couch," Spencer says.

S Bar. Lauren’s birthday party is in full swing by the time Steph and Roxy arrive. A happily buzzed Lauren gives Steph a big hug. "I know I don’t know you that well, but you know what, though? You’re a good person," she says. Lo and Audrina glare from another couch, sure that something "sketchy" is going on, but when Steph just smiles and waves, they play nice.

Bolthouse. Kimberly, who’d been working the door at S Bar during Lauren’s party, tells Heidi that Steph was in attendance. "That’s so crazy to me, that Lauren won’t even talk to me because of my boyfriend, but she’ll hang out with my boyfriend’s sister," Heidi says. Yeah, and how could Lauren forgive Steph, but not Heidi for possibly spreading, and at the very least laughing about, those sex tape rumo… oh, wait. "I’m definitely gonna have to ask Stephanie about that," Heidi says. But first she has to call Spencer, who handles the news in typically mature fashion. "What the hell is Lauren doing hanging out with my sister?" he complains.

Toast Bakery Cafe. Lauren and Brody meet for lunch, and he finally gets his hug. He’s also full of opinions about Lauren’s new friendship. "Let me just tell you, be cautious," he says. "I know Stephanie. I’ve known her for a while." He suggests that Steph may be a mole for Spencer and Heidi, but Lauren’s not buying it.

Lauren has it easy compared to Steph, though – Spencer’s waiting to pounce the second she walks through the door. At first Steph tries to laugh him off, but she becomes increasingly upset as he compares her to Brody and insinuates that he’ll cut ties with her over this. "You need to stop having enemies, Spencer," Steph says through tears. "She’s forgotten this." Spencer claims he’s forgotten it, too. "No you haven’t, because you’re making me cry right now," she replies. "You’re making yourself cry thinking about what you did," Spencer says. "So, I’m sorry that you’re making yourself cry." Steph of five episodes ago would have stuffed him into his hideous jelly aquarium for that comment, but New Steph just looks miserable.

Computer class. The instructor has the nerve to actually drone on about computers as Lauren and Steph attempt to discuss Steph and Spencer’s blowup. Lauren reasonably points out that Spencer was so hurt by his friendship with Brody ending that this probably scares him more than it normally would. "But you didn’t do anything wrong. You know that," she says.

Steph must really be dreading going home, because she heads over to Heidi’s. Heidi skips the rant and goes straight to the guilt-tripping, calling Steph her best friend, saying she’s like a sister, and complaining that she had to hear about Steph’s party attendance from a co-worker. Steph fights back this time, though. "What did you and Spencer do to her?" she asks. "Nothing," Heidi protests. "If you’re really thinking that, then I honestly don’t even want to talk to you." She won’t meet Steph’s eyes. "Obviously you wanted to go," she says lamely. "I’m glad I went," Steph replies, stone-faced. Game on.

Shown: The Hills’ Heidi Montag. MTV.ca

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