Mad Men Recap: In which we talk all too much about Hare Krishna and Don and Joan’s chemistry
Last week we got another measured dose of Betty, but once again the Francis household is nowhere to be seen. Instead it’s back to a plate of SCDP and agency hard times. Last we saw Lane, his Jaguar buddy got caught with gum in his pants that led to boardroom fisticuffs with Pete. Don and Megan pop up for some bickering, but it’s not as bad as the underwear party clean-up and Howard Johnson gelato spat, and seems to stem from his dissatisfaction at work. Joan is finally hearing from Dr. Harris about the future of their marriage that she ended, just as her long-ago ex, Sterling Cooper’s smug copywriter Paul Kinsey, is popping back into Harry Crane’s life.
When Lane’s UK lawyer tells him he needs to come up with cash to pay the taxes he owes Her Majesty, what we really see is…
Lane is broke, and unlike Nigel’s school fees, this payment isn’t one he can stall on. Lane always looks a little desperate around the edges, so it’s hard to tell how big a hole he’s dug himself.
When Pete reveals Jaguar might be a possibility now that “Bazooka Joe” has left, what we’re really thinking is…
Devils eating Sno-Cones aren’t going to cut it with Jaguar, Don. You’re going to need to bring your Kodak A-game to land this golden goose.
When Don grumbles about the extra work, and Pete fires back “You may have to stay past 5:30,” what he’s really saying is…
“This is a perfect excuse to take the late train and avoid Trudy; I am overjoyed.” But Pete should know that no one wins at a game of disparage with Don.
When Harry goes to see Paul Kinsey, who is now a Hare Krishna, he asks: “What the hell happened to you?” What he’s really thinking is…
Paul Kinsey was known for taking up anything from pipe smoking to beards to Civil Rights injustices. Is this just another one of his cultural obsessions, and if so, why did he have to pick one with such a bad haircut and soiled yellow turtleneck?
When we meet Paul’s girlfriend, Mother Lakshmi, what we’re really wondering is…
Is that Juliette Lewis? Later when she chants “Hare Krishna” into Harry’s ear she may as well be licking it and panting “Harry Crane” for the effect it’s having on him. Gross.
When Pete snidely digs at Lane, who’s frustrated he’s shutting down the bonuses, with: “What ghost visited you, Ebenezer?” What he’s really saying is…
“I’m not afraid to fight you again Lane, even if I lost last time.” We have no doubt Pete would love his colleagues to kiss his feet for getting a crack at a car account, but we’re sure he’s still thinking about how Beth Dawes never saw him in the newspaper. Maybe if she saw him in a sexy Jaguar she would put on her fur and lingerie and go for a ride?
When we see Roger is wearing a Hawaiian shirt over his suit and tie to commemorate Pearl Harbor, what we’re really wondering is…
When are we going to get to see a photo of a young Roger in uniform? And what colour would his hair be?
When Joan scolds a drunk Roger, and he openly talks about Kevin being his (“we made a baby”), what we’re left shocked and wondering is…
Has he always known? Does he know about Dr. Harris and Joan’s break up? Why aren’t these two taking little Kevin to the park and dressing him in a matching Hawaiian shirt already?
When Don and Megan are watching a play called “America Hurrah” which seems to be about the disillusionment of the American consumer with advertising, what Don is really thinking is…
“We should get a beer account.”
When Megan remarks to Don: “Yep, nope—should’ve been our wedding vows.” What she’s really saying is…
She’s invigorated after a night at the theatre and doesn’t think Don has a right to sulk. We can’t believe Don is being so pouty about it, especially since Megan looks so pretty in that sparkly-collar red dress. If they were saying “yep” and “nope” at their wedding though, would it now be Megan saying the “nope” or Don?
When Lane makes the cheque forgery, what we’re really thinking is…
We’re so glad that Leonardo DiCaprio was cast in Catch Me if You Can. Watching a ho hum–looking guy forge a cheque is not as fun as watching a babe. (Actually, in this case it’s really just sad.)
When Pete says to Don: “If I had told you last December that we’d be in the running for a car you would’ve kissed me on the mouth.” What he’s really saying is…
“I want some attention from someone around here!” With Ginsberg’s offbeat energy, we bet if Pete told him that he was going to be heading the Jaguar creative Pete would get that kiss.
When Joan freaks out on the witless secretary, what we’re really thinking is…
Joan should get outwardly angry more often.
When Joan and Don play husband and wife at the Jaguar dealership, what we’re really remembering is…
That time that guy got his foot chopped off by the John Deere at Joan’s going away party, and Don and Joan had a great chat in the hospital waiting room.
When Don recalls that his first impression of Joan included: “My first week there I thought you were dating Aly Khan.” What he’s really saying is…
“Joan, you’re the Rita Hayworth of SCDP.” We also love that Don admits she scared the shit out of him. Whether that’s true or not, it’s exactly the kind of thing that would make a helpless Joan feel like her old men-are-putty-in-my-hands self.
When Don says congratulations to Joan for getting divorced, what he’s really saying is…
At least someone besides Roger’s joining the club.
When Joan laments that there’s no good moment to tell a guy on a date she has a kid, Don recommends: “After you go all the way.” What we’re really thinking is…
We love that Don sees Joan as smart enough not to be condescended to, and that’s a roundabout way of saying that she is amazing in bed and no guy would leave her after having slept with her.
When Lakshmi shows up at Harry’s office and says “I’m burning for you, does your wife burn for you?” What we’re really thinking is…
How is Harry the only one having office sex lately?
When Don and Joan flirt back and forth and have a veiled chat about the troubles with Don’s relationship in the guise of talking about why men cheat, what we’re thinking is…
Don is an excellent wingman. We wish he’d help us pick up guys at bars in midtown.
When Lakshmi threatens Harry that he better not take Paul away from Hare Krishna, what we’re really thinking is…
Why does Harry have an old antique couch in his office? It’s as out of place in the SCDP décor as Harry.
When Roger plays flower delivery boy to Joan, what we’re really thinking is…
Well played, Don Draper. Joan could easily have a hook up with Roger if she was feeling lonely or low self-esteem-y about her sexuality, but that’s not that kind of male adoration she needs right now. Joan just needs someone to tell her she’s great and not want anything in return. No-strings-attached admiration.
When Harry gives Paul $500 to escape the Krishnas and head to L.A., what we’re really thinking is…
If Paul goes out to Los Angeles, we’d bet $500 that he becomes a Scientologist.
When Ginsberg, Stan and Peggy exchange looks about the Jaguar news, what they’re really silently saying is…
“Which one of us is going to come up with the winning idea?” They’re assuming Don has still checked out so it’s up to them.
When Don gives a rising speech about landing Jaguar, he says “the world will know we’ve arrived.” What he’s really saying is…
“The world will know I am back.” We’re happy Don’s feeling fired up about the American dream again, but we’re too busy trying to read that little cut to Joan’s face during his speech. Is she feeling some pride that she may have helped stoke Don’s work fire or is she thinking of herself and how she is now depending on work to give her the pride she will no longer get in marriage, and that a new client like Jaguar is a means to that end?
Mad Men airs Sundays at 10 p.m. on AMC. Tune in next week when Megan goes method for a role in Cabaret and wears nothing but fishnets and lingerie, saying to Don, “That’s not what this is.”
