Girls Recap: We discuss the quirk (and irk)-filled pilot of HBO’s most buzzed-about show

Welcome to our weekly recap of Girls, the new show from HBO that media are touting as Sex and the City for Millennials. It’s likely journalists just like to compare things that share numbers, like New Kids on the Block and the Backstreet Boys had five guys singing to teenage girls, because while Sex and the City and Girls both take a concerted look at the lives of four women living in New York City, that is where the similarities awkwardly pause. Girls is mostly concerned with Hannah, who is 24, works in publishing and lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn like a current-day Emily Gould. Hannah lives with her gallerist bestie Marnie. There’s also their friend Jessa, who has just arrived back in the city from some kind of spiritual quest/pearl shucking/bazaar shopping expedition and is living with her earnest, velour-tracksuit-wearing cousin Shoshanna.

Like any girl in her early twenties, post-college or no, these ladies have problems of the guy/work/family/friend variety, so let’s see how they go about solving them, or more likely, making them worse. Each week we’ll take a look at the two main problems affecting the Girls and how they go about trying to find a solution. Ten years older than the Girls, and having lived through her fair share of humiliations, your recapper will also weigh in on whether these problems are just rest stops on the road to better character or psyche damaging pile-ups that will follow them the rest of their days.

Mo’ (or less) money mo’ problems »

Girls Problem: Getting cut off by your folks and having to face the bummer that is “money concerns.”

Hannah’s been interning for a year at a publishing house and writing her memoir on the side. Her professor parents have been supporting her but are now cutting her off so they can sit by a lake someday. Forced to ask her boss for full-time employment, she unwittingly ends up getting fired and having to do that awful half-handshake/half-hug thing with her boss. Hannah laments her lack of special skills (like Photoshop or yoga) to her hook-up Adam. He doesn’t help, but he does get laid. Luckily, her friends are generous with their wise advice. Marnie reasons if Hannah asks for just a bit more money while she job searches, they’ll acquiesce. Jessa feels Hannah just needs to declare her artistic spirit and they’ll support her in the name of creativity. Hannah, high on opium tea, visits her parents’ hotel to show them a draft of her memoir in an effort to prove that their support is funding the voice of a generation (a.k.a. the artist route proposed by Jessa). Needless to say, it does not work.

Ten years from now: Hannah will look back at this struggle and realize she should’ve gotten a part-time job while she was interning like everyone else. She’ll also have some Photoshop skills and her own intern wherever she’s working so she doesn’t have to use them.

Girls Problem: That boyfriend who is so nice and saccharinely supportive that he makes you feel like a bitch.

Marnie’s boyfriend Charlie does overly nice things like make her morning coffee even though she doesn’t give him sex or affection, promises to pick up wine unprompted and apologizes for having friends she doesn’t like. Marnie is so repulsed by his niceness that she’s at that point where “his touch now feels like a weird uncle just putting his hand on my knee at Thanksgiving.” She seemingly has her stuff figured out and didn’t think dating a good guy would feel this annoying. She bosses her friends around in a well-meaning, maternal way and throws dinner parties, therefore she should love his normality. Also, he’s even more annoying when high, which should be reason enough for wanting to break up with him if you ask us.

Ten years from now: Marnie will have dated a few guys who won’t let her call every shot. She’ll realize that they’re just as tiresome. She likely has a five-year plan, so by 10 she’ll either be: a mother of one, married to a guy who did seem to have it together but who is now taking some time off to “figure it out” while she supports them; or she’ll have figured out that the only thing she can control is her career and it might be more satisfying to focus on. Also, we predict she’ll still be repulsed at the thought of Charlie blowing up a kiss on her in the morning.

Girls airs Sundays at 10:30 p.m. on HBO Canada. Tune in next week when we’ll tackle more Girls Problems like how to find a job that won’t interfere with memoir writing.